45 Yuan
30A?
It's said that a visit to a Mainland "sauna" will,
in just one ecstatic shudder, tear down all the morals
and values that a man takes decades to build up.
That this 45 Yuan ticket that this 45 Yuan ticket
would turn out to be my entry pass to a road of no return.
This is my story. It all started when I was 25...
(DUE WEST I OUR SEX JOURNEY)
Before then, I had always tried to do the right thing
and be a model citizen.
I figure this is probably because
I was raised in a sort of model household.
That's my mother, the one with the long face.
She's the Vice Principal and a Discipline Officer at a girls' school.
The one with the glasses next
to her is my father.
He's a senior officer in the Drainage Services Department.
"Loyal and devoted" would be the best way
to describe his relationship with her.
What kind of filth is this?
It will rot your mind. This is not for you!
Read this one. This one is more like it.
Ever since I could remember, morn encouraged
free speech, democracy, and equity.
We would convene regular family meetings
to discuss any household issues.
I have to go to the countryside again next week,
so in regards to the minutes,
I may have to submit them at the next meeting.
Didn't you just go?
There has been a water shortagein those areas lately,
so they need volunteers to continue providing aid.
OK... Request granted.
If there is nothing else on the agenda,
the meeting is adjourned.
Mom, I've got a request.
Say "Chairman".
Chairman, I have a proposal.
Continue.
I think I'm old enough now
and therefore request that
I manage my own pocket money.
You're still young, how can you be so sure?
Once you're old enough,
mommy will let you do it yourself.
But morn, I am old enough!
All right, since you insist,
I will respect your request.
Let's vote on it.
All in favor of our boy managing his own money, raise your hands.
All opposed?
Based on vote count, the motion is defeated.
Meeting adjourned.
Chairman, I have a new proposal.
Continue.
It's like this. I...
I want to start buying my own underwear.
Why?
Don't you like what morn picks?
But this is kind of private...
That's right!
As with exterior pipes of a building,
which is a group matter,
If repairs are needed,
it must be approved by the building owners.
But my "thing" is not a group matter!
Daddy, what are you going on about?
Teaching our son social responsibility.
Mom, Dad, I totally understand.
But I'm a grown up, it's time for a little independence.
Fine. We are a democracy.
Let's put it to a vote.
All in favor of Frankie buying his own undies, hands up.
All opposed?
Well, then. It's settled.
Daddy, if you would please put this in the minutes.
Meeting adjourned.
Thus, no one understands better than I
the problems of an electorate.
After all these years,
the only thing we didn't need a vote on
was my refusal to study in the UK.
After all,
what kind of parents don't want
their children with them?
What the heck?
What are you doing?
But my refusal to go to England
wasn't due to filial piety.
It was because of my dream girl...
According to Baidu Answers
"First Love" is
merely youngsters longing
to have contact with and
understand the opposite sex,
but not true love.
Without a doubt, Zoey was my first love.
- Haha... - Argh
Someone, help me to the nurse's office.
Hah, neutered by a she-male. That's ten years of bad luck!
Stand back, everyone. Don't get any on you!
It's your lucky day!
- Let's go. - Ok.
"Silhouette" by Zhu Ziqing
He crosses the tracks,
trying hard to climb up the platform, opposite.
Two hands grasp high, two feet try to follow;
I could never get why Zhu Zi-Qing
would get all weepy just from looking at his dad's back.
This lecture on "Silhouette" did nothing for me.
This other silhouette, however...
...it brings me to tears
I wipe them away,
fearing that he will see, that others will see.
The next moment when I looked out of the window again,
father was already on the way back, holding bright red tangerines in both hands.
In crossing the railway track, he first put the tangerines on the ground,
At that moment, I knew for sure
I had finally become a man.
A big man.
There wasn't much in the way of an internet back then.
So the easiest way for guys
to look at naked women
was just to buy a nudie mag
available at any street vendor.
What are you guys looking at?
Get in line!
Let's share.
Line up!
Wait out front when school's out.
This underdeveloped little guy is Wang Jing,
my only friend in high school.
"Jing" means quiet,
which is what he is.
When he does talk, each word is a gem.
Of all the people I knew, he understood me best,
almost like he could hear me thinking.
On the other hand,
he'd never look straight at me,
so I could never tell what he was thinking
Wow! Is that Yuki Maiko?!
You want big? HK tits will never be as big as white chicks'.
That's when I realized
breasts weren't like I thought.
Wang Jing thus became, along with the skin mags,
the encouraging and friendly mentor
of my new alter ego.
This is good stuff. Just give it back when you're done.
But I never did ask him,
how was it that such a prepubescent guy like him
could be so knowledgeable?
Who taught him all this stuff?
Was it Miss Sex from the "Yes" column?
Or maybe Dr. Kinsey from
"Reader's Digest"?
That will always remain a mystery.
I'm so happy to serve you.
I would be so satisfied and proud of myself
if I can just make you feel good.
You're such a good girl.
But I'm so bad!
That feel good?
Really?
Yeah, really, really good...
Really?
Really? Really?
Really?
Thank you so much.
Hey Dad, aren't you at tea with morn?
Why are you back alone?
I got a stomachache so I left first.
Have you eaten, yet?
Yep.
Please, please spit the damn thing out!
Hey, what's with all the racket out there?
Oh... Nothing, just the TV.
The silver one is still better...
Make yourselves comfortable.
Mom, you're back.
Are you hot, son?
Why is your face all sweaty? Do you have a fever?
Don't come over here!
I just finished a workout.
I'll be fine.
Go get dressed. You're so embarrassing!
Aw, what's the worry?
We've seen it all since he was little.
Your aunties wouldn't mind an updated peek!
What were you doing just now?
Why is there a pair of boxers in the living room?
Dad just came back, said something about diarrhea,
and took them off as he came in.
Your father should know better.
Dropping things everywhere!
This is so embarrassing...
It's okay. I can be like that when I'm in a rush.
Of course. Understandable.
Turn on the TV. There's a show I'm following.
Son, where's the remote?
The remote... No idea.
Forget the TV
and hurry up.
Let's get this game going.
You don't have to chuck the remote just because you don't like what's on.
Where's Baby?
Baby, stop running around! Come here. Good boy!
I never would've guessed that Mrs. Chan
would be the first woman to swallow my load.
Imagine that. She even seems to like it!
Come on, we're waiting.
Son, go get some drinks for us.
What?
Take care of our guests!
Uh, I...
I what?
What is wrong with you today?
Mom, you're always telling me to study harder and
get a good grade.
Well, I'm trying to right now,
yet here you are playing mahjong!
How am I supposed to concentrate?
You say one thing, but do another.
I just can't take it.
What your son says is right.
Why don't we go to my place instead?
Right! It's rare for kids
- to be so studious these days. - Let's go.
Mom's wrong. It won't happen again.
Thank you, mom.
What's the matter, officer?
We've received complaints
of objects being thrown from here.
How could that be? We're just playing mahjong!
Well then, is this remote yours?
Well, all remotes look the same.
Wait. Weren't you just saying you couldn't find yours?
Couldn't this be it?
Officer, you'd best check before making allegations.
I don't know electronics. Ask my son.
Son, does this look like our remote?
This thing isn't from our home.
See? And it's so beat-up,
you could say it's anybody's!
What's the big deal. Try it and see.
It's so broken, there's no point.
This ought to work.
Dad!
After that incident,
mom never held another family meeting.
She never even mentioned it again.
It seemed like she wasn't so strict, either.
It was almost like I was a freed slave!
However, everyone in the neighborhood
now knew who I was.
You're only 'l6. There's still plenty of time.
Find a nice girl to lay.
You won't have to yank it yourself anymore.
Like it's that easy.
Where there's a will, there's a way.
Wait for my word.
Wang Jing handed me a condom
like it was nothing
and left without a word.
Honestly, if I hadn't accidentally
once seen one in Dad's room,
I would have thought it was a piece of gum
and popped it in my mouth.
A box would have been nice.
At least that would have had some instructions in it.
Son. It's for you.
When Jing told me to wait for his word,
I didn't ask for word of what.
But that very night,
he called and right off the bat said...
Done and dusted.
Why does "dusted"
necessarily follow "done"?
Why not "done and delivered"?
And what about the phrase
"Lipstick on a pig"?
Why not a dress?
I drew a blank
and couldn't guess what Jing was up to.
...up until he mentioned meeting Zoey.
That woke me up!
Turns out we were going camping.
And wouldn't you know it, a pig on the trip.
Here, let me help you.
I never asked Jing how he arranged that date with Zoey.
And at that moment
it was the last thing from my mind.
Let me.
Oh, I can manage.
Are you okay?
I'm fine. Just need some cough syrup.
I was simply too focused on finding a way
to use that "stick of gum" he gave me.
Takeit
Your sausage is done. Brush some honey on it.
Hey, Jean. Let's take a walk.
Why the hell should we do that?
To have a chat.
To have a chat?!
- Sure! - Hey! Jean! Jean!
Hah. That was weird, huh?
Yeah... Pretty weird.
How about we put on some music?
Sure.
Can I get you a drink?
Sure, thanks!
Get some booze in her.
Once she's nice and drunk, you can...
ls there beer?
Yes...
- Then beer it is! - Great...
Cheers!
Another one!
Really? You still want more?
Come on, drink with me.
Oh. Okay.
Bottoms up!
Give me another.
What? You really up to this?
I'm fine. You'll take care of me, right?
Isure will.
I'll take care of everything.
You sure you can keep drinking?
Of course! I'm a guy.
Who says I can't handle it? More!
Also, has anyone told you
you have two heads and four boobs?
Do you think you're pretty?
Are you all right? Let me help you inside.
I'm fine.
Wasn't there something you wanted to say? Say it!
The moon is like my heart.
What?
Do you believe in aliens?
Fucking aliens?!
You asshole! Wasting my time!
You're so full of it.
I have an alien dissection video. Wanna see?
Go to hell!
Your loss.
You're so pretty...
Really?
You know,
I've liked you for a long time.
Will you be my girlfriend?
Yes...
Finally.
And the rice is ready.
You guys already back?
Honey, you're so naughty!
And such was the result of mixing
soda, beer, and cough syrup: my virginity
given up to a pig wearing lipstick.
I wanted to kill myself that night and be done with,
but they swore
they wouldn't tell anyone,
so I changed my mind.
But it's not like I could just believe them.
I'm not stupid, you know.
Hey, what are you doing,sneaking around?
Don't run away, Frankie!
What's with you today, all disguised
with your dark glasses and everything?
You could still tell it's me?
Even if you had a bag over your head
Nevermind, I'm off to class.
You're in deep shit now!
Why? What happened?
Word has it that you...
failed your English test!
Is that all?
And that's not a big enough deal?
Forget him.
It's time for us to get to class. Let's go.
Frankly,l would've been better off
jerking into a toilet.
So that's what I tried
to convince myself had happened.
Say what you did this time.
Cursing.
Fine, then here is the punishment.
Go back and write a thousand times
"l will never swear again."
I didn't they'd keep their promise.
Next time will be worse.
Honey, I'm wearing a T-back today!
You like eating pigs' lips?
Now who's got the lifetime of bad luck!
Enough!
Yummy pig lips!
That was the last time I saw Zoey,
because after that I took charge
and made up my mind!
I'm going to England! And I want to go tomorrow!
Like a lot of people,
I thought that I'd be hooking up
with blondes as soon as I arrived,
but that wasn't exactly the case.
You know what's worse than being stuck with a porker?
Answer: being stuck in a herd of them.
Really, everything is relative.
This make me think back sometimes,
Jean wasn't actually that bad.
Of course, things aren't always bad.
Margaret, a British-Chinese mix,
was my only girlfriend in England.
Actually, she was my real first love.
A lot of people envied me for having
such a hottie the first time out.
But then, there are always two sides to every story.
Almost!
Aw, it's just a game...
What? Kick with the left!
Don't get so upset. It's just a game.
This is a big match. I have to watch it.
Okay, I'll turn it off.
I'm sorry.
Come on, one more time.
Though Margaret and I were both Arsenal fans,
I didn't think she would copy their style, too,
playing with herself
outside the field like that.
So I decided to copy one of my heroes, Batistuta,
and attack her full-force.
Turns out that sent Margaret
to the ER with a broken wrist.
Which is how I discovered my cup of tea
wasn't Earl Grey. Not traditional enough.
After that, I never dated another white chick.
I went home to Hong Kong after graduating
and found a sales and marketing job
for a multinational.
Hey! "The Hypocritic" put up a new one!
Snow-white tits and pink nipples,
Bouncy squeeze
Love'em to bits
This chubby guy,
a year ahead and my former dorm mate in England,
is James.
His only two interests are hookers and cursing.
What are you doing at my desk?
Grab a seat and have a look!
It's easier to hide here.
Of course this shit's good.
Hell, see for yourself
Performance Rankings?
What rankings? Horses?
Not horses. Whores!
You were close.
Don't ever say I never gave you anything.
This website has the latest info on all the hookers in town.
Especially this guy calling himself "Hypocritic"
Not only do his reports have pictures,
but detailed listings of their special skills!
They're fucking unreal!
He's like our patron saint.
Pretty damned awesome, right?
First of all, I'm no john like you all.
Secondly, you guys shouldn't use
my computer to browse this kind of stuff.
C'mon, guys. There are women here.
Watch yourselves.
It's not like that.
Women these days are wilder than you!
Like you're so damned straight-laced.
Don't worry, we'll bring you along next time.
Thanks, but no. Go if you want to,
Leave me out of it.
Bullshit!
No such thing as a cat that don't like fish.
And if you've never had roast goose,
you can't say you don't like it.
Kid, take my advice,
don't waste your time fooling with regular girls.
Come with us and have a straight-up good time.
Frankie.
This one with the serious faceand the big tits is Susan,
the boss' daughter and my superior.
Frankie, we've got an Australian client coming in the afternoon.
You take care of him.
Susan, I bought your favorite,
blueberry cheesecake.
Let me go get it for you.
But... it's high in calories.
Of course, but this one is high protein and low sugar!
If James was born in Emperor Kang Xi's time,
I'm sure he could have out-flattered the best courtesans.
You picked it to match, right?
Since when?
You talk like you know me so well.
But what I learned from his skills were useful,
like that time it helped me close a deal with a huge foreign account...
Actually, I could use your help.
I want to get a hooker.
Where can I find them in Hong Kong?
Er...
You don't know, do you?
- Oh, forget it. - I myself don't get hookers.
Seems to me like,
"That is completely rubbish."
But to keep the relationship with this client,
and to show the spirit of "Hong Kong, the Entertainment Capital,"
I decided to tell him about that website
and everything about it.
Doesn't look bad.
What kind of service?
BBBJTCNQNS shouldn't be a problem.
BBBJ... What is that?
Bareback blow-job to completion,
no quit, no spit.
But in Cantonese, we call it...
- "Mouth Bomb" - Mouth Bomb?
I like the sound of that!
Should we give it a try?
Can we get going?
How far is it?
What was it again?Mouth Bomb?
Really?
Mouth Bomb, was it?
Mouth Bomb!
Fate can sometimes work in weird ways.
Despite meeting Zeta in this situation,
I was smart enough
to put the blame on the foreigner.
And she believed me!
Though I can't be sure if she was gullible in general
or just around me.
Here we are together,
the last minute before 3pm,
the16th of April, 2011.
Let's remember this moment.
Such a shame the moment was gone so soon.
If I could go back to that day,
I would say three words to her. "l love you"
If I had to put a time limit on that love,
I would set it at ten thousand years.
I just thought of what Eileen Chang wrote,
"So much love carved into our hearts.
Yet so often coming to naught."
Don't worry. As Amy Chang said,
"Love is a part of self-improvement
that we each must experience...
Hurting others and being hurt.
Joy, dismay, despair, longing, waiting.
Suffering from pain, followed by enlightenment.
What matters isn't what you get or lose,
but how much you grow and how much you learn.
Your life will be more colorful and never again the same.
Doesn't that make you sick?
Same here, listening to myself talk.
Well, love does weird things to people.
Said another way, we were a perfect match.
Not only that. Zeta had the kind ofjob
that makes guys come running.
It sure got me excited.
Most important of all, though,
was that she was my only soul-mate.
Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday, baby!
Aw, that's so sweet.
Since you're her boyfriend,
don't you think you should sing for her?
- Yeah, sing! - Sing...
What? I'm no good at singing.
I'll pick a song for you.
Just one song!
Pick one for me, too!
Okay, just a sec.
"Doing the best but not being appreciated"
"You decide to follow him"
"He doesn't cherish you, but I'm most happy to"
"I'm resolved to love him, wish me happiness"
"You know I will be with him no matter what"
"Even if it hurts, I will wait for him"
What the? They're terrible!
"I still watch you, Will he be moved?"
"Watching you walk along the cliff."
Hey, shower-up first.
But I just took one!
Then stop messing around!
Okay, right away.
Remember to clean better down there!
Okay.
Don't forget to use mouthwash after brushing!
Okay!
All set!
What are you up to?
Nothing.
Nothing?
You're putting my article up on the web?
It's good stuff, don't worry about it.
No, delete it.
No!
Try it again and you won't get any!
I did everything. See?
Okay.
Just once without turning off the lights?
Forget it then.
Okay, okay.
Not here.
Not there, either.
Come on, just a peck.
You know full well that I'm allergic to saliva.
Then I won't use any.
No!
Okay, okay.
Now put on a condom.
But he's not ready, yet.
How about your mouth pitch in a little...
Use your own mouth!
Yay! There's a response!
Don't worry about me. Keep going.
I told you. See?
So many positive comments already!
"My boyfriend's excellent article"?
Miss Z is you?
I'm your girlfriend.
Of course I'm the first one to support you!
I'll always be your number one fan!
Why don't we do it again?
You pervert!
Just once with the lights on?
- Then forget it. - Okay, okay.
Dr. Kinsey said that a mutually harmonious sex life
is the lubricant in a relationship.
If lovers spend a lot of time together in disharmony,
they will build anger and become resentful,
letting small problems turn into big arguments
That can destroy the relationship, or the life of either partner.
Don't make a scene out of it! It's no big deal!
You think it's no big deal?!
Zeta: You are up early trnr, you should sleep now XD
Frankie: Ok, baby, I'll call you trnr, gd n8
It's just MSN.
So what if I forgot to add a smiley!
It's not just MSN.
How many times have I told you?
Are you trying to be rude?
Fuck! I don't even finish my sentences with a period
and you expect me to add a goddamned smiley face?
Are you swearing at me?
I swore... but not at you!
You are hopeless!
Failed relationships are a big deal to me.
When people are at their saddest and loneliest,
they usually look up an old friend.
So I naturally thought of him...
Congratulations.
Out with the old, in with the new.
Growing up never made me forget
my good friend Wong Jing.
Actually, we kept in touch
through the years.
He'd been up to Shenzhen a lot for work since graduating
I don't know what weird things he'd been eating,
but it's like he hit another cycle, filling out
into someone tall and handsome.
Pick up girls on the mainland?
Don't think about how far it is.
What we need is to establish
a one-hour swingers club.
One-hour swingers club?!
Simple words that started filling me
with hope and vision.
Such a club would not only be good for the economy,
but also for the exchange of resources
and cultures between the North and the South.
Being single
with nothing holding me back,
I decided this was a journey worth taking!
This way.
Sir? Over here.
We already booked a sofa.
So why are we standing over here?
Since you got here a bit late,
we had to give it to our frequent customers.
That sofa over there is clearly available.
Same as you, late.
Look, if you can scratch my back,
I can scratch your back.
- And what's that mean? - See what you can do.
If you would...
Right this way.
Here you are.
Beer.
Good. Two dozen to start, then.
Are you kidding me?
How can he do that!
It's just not right.
You can't pinch pennies when you're out to have fun.
Especially here.
They're coming.
Introduce yourselves.
Hi, I'm Frankie.
Hi, uh, Funky? I'm Dorathy.
What? Dolphin?
I'm Jeekalin.
- Jeekalin... - Yamade.
"Yamade" is a name?
Why not "Kimochi"?
How about a drink? Beer?
These were girls Jing picked up before.
Frankly, they're not much to look at,
with hair and makeup all about the same.
And by the time I hit the toilet. I couldn't tell one from the other.
But those racks.
They definitely left an impression.
Is it the artificial bread, the weight-loss pills,
or the contaminated fish they eat
that messes with their DNA?
Most HK girls have tits
you can barely pinch.
But these boobs?
I just want to grab them!
We're separated by just one river, but what a difference!
All I can say is, "Different regions, different grapes."
We're out of drinks. Waiter!
Two bottles of Matisseand a dozen green teas!
One Long Island Iced Tea, Martini
They can hardly say their own English names,
but when it comes to drinks, they might even
be more accurate than native speakers.
If they just used cocktails
as their names
they'd be much better off.
It's my turn, ten!
Let me play, come on...
You asked for it!
Ready... ten!
Fifteen.
My turn, ready?... ten!
Fifteen.
Ready... all open! Drink up!
Why play with her when she always loses?
Let's play in a group.
Drink up! You lost again!
So arrogant.
Yeah. What of it?
Keep drinking.
Hey, Jeekalin,
I think you should change your name to Black Russian.
Then it would actuallysound right when you say it.
What? Don't be stupid.
Let's go "dang-sing."
Yeah, he's crazy.
Seriously,
I'm fine if your chicks want to fill up the table with drinks.
But do they think we're fools?
That this is some kind of open bar
for wine-tasting?
Remember: when you're out to play, you're only out to play.
What's that supposed to mean?
I never ask the girl's number when I get a happy ending massage.
When downloading porn,
I delete it as soon as I've watched it.
Think about what I'm telling you.
Jing is really quite reckless.
He treats emotions as carelessly as he spends money.
Could it be that I have something to learn from him?
Zeta: Be strong (:P)
You can't worry so much when you're out.
How else can you forget the past.
I had no response for that.
A seasoned veteran with years of experience,
Jing knew me better than ever before.
Who would bring a Polaroid to a disco?
They had me thinking that the photographer
Yasumasa Yonehara was here.
But a closer look revealed Hong Kong guys
with less than discerning taste.
The way they were holding those dogs
reminded me of economist
Paul Samuelson's theory of Happiness
equaling Utility divided by Desire.
Did I just have my sights set too high?
Or must I lower my standards when I'm out
in order to be happy?
I believe in you.
Have patience and you'll get there.
This snide remark
was the second time I wanted to hit Jing.
The first time was after going camping.
But as a long time Arsenal fan,
I'd long learned to have patience.
After that time, we went up to Shenzhen
nearly every week to have fun.
But in all actuality,
we were going up for nothing.
That Saturday, Jing and I went up again.
It was raining cats and dogs that night,
a night I'll never forget.
During those months, I realized that
the disco was a very straightforward place.
No matter if you were looking for a one night stand,
if you're giving or getting, it's the same.
There's no beating about the bush.
Unlike trying to get a normal girl.
Ever heard of the five-second rule?
It means that if two strangers
exchange a look for more than five seconds,
something important is going to happen.
Of course, you have to be smart about the other person,
or else you could be in for a beating.
The magic of her gaze could have pulled me in,
regardless of a beat-down.
And just when I couldn't come up with a good ice-breaker...
Can I come to your table?
Absolutely...
I mean, sure you can.
Are you all right?
I'm fine.
Am I... intruding here?
No.
Go on, don't worry about us.
I don't usually come here,
so I'm a little out of place.
My friend had me come out to keep her company,
but she's not here, yet.
Oh, I see.
If you told me you were a virgin, I'd still believe you!
Oh, I still haven't introduced myself.
My name is Frankie.
My name is Fish, you know, the swimming kind...
Fish, such a cute name. It suits you.
Who uses a name like Fish these days?
Idiotic, really.
Cheers!
Actually, my friend had a breakup today.
She called me over to keep her company.
So here I am.
But it's no fun here.
Some friend, leaving you hanging this way.
But don't worry. I can take her place.
What kind of work do you do?
I'm in sales.
After drinking and talking,
Turns out she's from the countryside, but
has been in Shenzhen for a few years.
She opened up a boutique with a friend
and came here after work to meet her.
I really should thank her friend
for her breakup and being late.
You're out on a Saturday night.
Doesn't your boyfriend mind?
Actually...
There's no friend with a breakup. I'm the one who got dumped.
I'm really, really, really upset. So...
Could you keep me company tonight?
At first, I had doubts if the four words
"keep rne company tonight" meant what I thought she was hinting at.
Actually, I don't really like it here.
But her body language...
How about we go back to my place?
Reassured me.
Won't it be inconvenient or a bother to your family?
I live alone.
You can stay with me tonight.
Sometimes it's hard to believe when Luck knocks on your door.
I could still hardly believe it myself.
In that situation,
how could I refuse?
Sol made a quick decision.
Then let's go.
Hey, was that Lucy Liu?
What? Really?
Stupid, she looks more like Maggie Q!
I said you'd get there.
Congratulations. You got what you'd been waiting for.
Drive that cue home!
Though I wasn't sure why people talk about
a "cue" when describing sex,
I was confident that my cue was going to be
able to clear the table that night.
Sorry, it's been a while since I've cleaned,
so it's a little messy. Hope you don't mind.
That's fine. Might get messier later.
What was that?
Oh, I said it's not bad, that's all.
I'd be better off if you did me now, instead!
Your place is quite comfy.
Yeah, I really like it here,
but I might need to move soon.
Why is that?
I may not be able to afford the rent soon.
Do you think you could help out
and share it with me?
We've only just met.
Be my boyfriend,
then we could live together. Wouldn't that be great?
What do you say?
I really need someone to take care of rne,
because I'm broke.
Two thousand. Just two thousand a month.
Please say yes.
Are you joking?
Fish was likely out looking for a
horny Hong Kong guy for emergency funds.
If I paid her, she'd be my mistress.
And I'm probably
not the only one!
Wouldn't I have to share her around?
It's just too nasty.
I couldn't stand that.
Remember: when you're out to play, you are only out to play.
I will really like you and treat you really well.
I have a high-level, Western education.
I cannot let myself be easily taken down by her charm.
Stop it. Please control yourself!
Dammit! Is it even humanly possible
to push her away?
How could I face myself?
We'd only known each other a couple of hours.
If I'm not her only guy,
isn't this kissing really gross?
But aren't spoons licked by
different restaurant customers all the time?
Everyone uses it, no one seems to mind.
Besides, what I'm enjoying right now
is the soft tongue of a beautiful girl!
Why the hell am I still thinking? What's two grand?
I pay that much to the government every month.
Are they going to French me?
If I'm paying two grand to get bent over
why not pay that to bend someone else over!
At least it will even out my stress.
Okay.
Huh?
Okay. I'll pay you. We'll live together.
What's wrong?
Nothing.
I just had them done in Shenzhen.
The doctor said they'll eventually soften back to normal.
Soften back to normal?
I'm back to normal down there already!
I've grabbed big tits and I've groped small HK tits.
But I have never felt a pair of tits as hard as these.
Why?
Why would I be so ignorant to think that
all breasts should be soft?
It's like saying